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Christian Homes And Special Kids |
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Birth Parent's Line 1-800-266-9837 Contact CHASK 208-267-6246 |
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For Birth Parents
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She Had an Abortion by Tom and Sherry Bushnell
Perhaps one of the hardest things to do is step into a person’s shoes to feel what they might be feeling. The idea of doing something as desperate as abortion is not on our radar screen. Yet, God has called us to do just that… to emotionally step into the shoes and love those who have broken their own hearts by things they have done. They are the ones that God is calling us to minister to and forgive. Here is a CHASK story that will inspire you to look beyond the act of pregnancy termination, and look to the heart of the matter through Jesus' eyes.
“She is walking down the road that way,”…a neighbor pointed. A distant figure walked slowly, stopping now and then. “Is she looking for something?” the neighbor shaded his eyes trying to focus against the bright spring sunshine. “Well, sort of….” Dana replied sadly. Truth was, Mandy had chosen to abort her baby with Down syndrome 3 months ago. Nagging guilt had settled in Mandy’s heart. She had contacted CHASK for possible post abortion counseling. Dana, a CHASK mom, made a decision to befriend and encourage Mandy. Their first meeting had gone poorly, or so it seemed at first. Their conversation had ended with Mandy jumping up, running out of the house and down the road. Falling tears embarrassed Mandy and she wasn’t willing to stay for comfort. Dana wasn’t sure if she should sit down and wait for her return or follow her. She thought, “Hmmm… Mandy is looking for something and I know what it is. Forgiveness!” “Well, I sure hope she finds whatever she is after…” the neighbor picked up his lawn rake. Dana’s hesitation switched to decision. If Mandy was looking for forgiveness, Dana knew she might be Mandy’s only hope of helping her know where to find it. Dana started jogging toward Mandy, not knowing what to say. The Lord would have to give her the words. Abortion is an awful decision to make. It is never easy. I think almost every mother wishes she could be that “perfect pregnant mommy”. But the world is good at convincing pregnant moms that being “ready” means being totally healthy, totally financially prepared, and always in the ideal life situation. Not many of us can say we have arrived. When special needs is added to the picture and the worst case scenario painted for baby’s health, 90% of women choose to terminate their pregnancy. Many women become convinced that they cannot parent and choosing life means choosing suffering for their baby. Dana walked silently beside Mandy a few minutes later, catching her own breath. She begged God to give her something to say to Mandy that would share the heart of Jesus. “I love you Mandy, and Jesus loves you too, so much!” Mandy’s dragging feet stopped and she looked up with a tear-stained, surprised look on her face. “Why? I have just killed my baby. Why would He love me...and why would you care about me, a total stranger?” Dana took a deep breath. She took Mandy’s hand in hers and put her finger in the middle and pressed in… “Well, Jesus loved me so much, in spite of the awful things I had done, that He let his own hands be nailed to the cross and He died there. Just so I could be forgiven. It was the only way my guilty heart could be made free. Since he has done this incredible thing for me, I want to love Him with all of my heart. And loving Him means loving you, Mandy. Dana led Mandy over to a large tree along the road. Sitting down in the grass, she pulled a Kleenex from her pocket and gave it to Mandy. Dana’s own tears now spilled down her cheeks and splattered on her jeans leaving wet blotches. Mandy looked in wonder at Dana’s earnest face blinking back tears, “How can you believe all of that?” Dana then went on to share her story of her own abortion at age 25 and the mental torture she experienced for several years. Someone shared with her the love of Jesus and led her to the throne of grace to find forgiveness. “Because my guilt is gone! Mandy, my guilty heart is gone. After Jesus filled me with peace, I became a new person inside. Yes, my baby is with Him, and I did the wrong thing. But I now know that I will see my baby again and that it will all be O.K.” Mandy’s fresh flood of sobs shook her shoulders… “Can I be forgiven too?” So Dana and Mandy, under that tree by the road, spent 2 hours talking and sharing. Later, together, they made a special little memorial under the tree...a sort of remembrance for a life that was lost, and a new life in Christ begun. Healing had begun. Walking back to the house later, the neighbor was not in his yard… but Dana wished he would have been. Mandy had indeed found what she was looking for!
CHASK UPDATE: January through July have been pretty busy months here at CHASK. Over 80 birth moms or parents have been ministered to by various CHASK families.
Here is a quick run down on some of them: Birth mom pregnant with her 3rd child just found out her baby has Down syndrome. Her husband is in Iraq and will not be present for the birth. Her other two children also have serious disabilities. She is overwhelmed and is looking for help. Birth mom with nerve disease wishes to place her baby for adoption. 5 CHASK families are sent to her to review. Birth mom with 20-week-old unborn baby with Down syndrome is referred by a geneticist in CA. We counsel with birth mom and send families. Baby’s life is terminated. CHASK family is praying for birth mom, that God would use this situation in her life to bring her to Him. Grandma in her 70’s cannot care for her 11-year-old special needs grandson with FAS due to her health problems. A CHASK family adopts him. Baby girl has a stroke in utero after her mom is injured in a car accident. Birth parents are exploring parenting options. 8 CHASK families are sent to them. With encouragement, they decide to keep their baby. Low income birth mom, who struggles with mental disability and blindness, became pregnant while staying at a mental institution. After getting out of confinement, she called CHASK, we contacted a local CHASK family who befriended her and shared food and Christ’s love with her. She wishes to place her baby with this pastor and his wife. They are continuing to supply for her physical needs and share their lives with her as well. Hispanic baby with Trisomy 13 is born and a DNR (Do Not Resuscitate) order is placed at birth. He refuses to die. The hospital releases the family and the baby a few days later. Baby stops breathing, is resuscitated and is placed in hospice. Baby is released 7 days later. Birth parents fall in love with their son. They become his advocates, fighting for his life in a system prepared to let him die. A CHASK family in TX comes along side and provides love, care and resources. He passes on to be with Jesus 24 days after his birth. Family will miss their son, but had 24 wonderful life changing days in which they poured their love on him. Mother of 19-year-old birth mom with autism, calls CHASK to share that her daughter is expecting in October. She finds a loving CHASK family for her grandchild, that is accepting of her daughter’s special needs and their family situation. Birth mom who is Chinese, has given birth to a baby girl with chromosomal anomaly. She wishes to place her baby with an adoptive family. She is totally emotionally distraught. After counseling with several CHASK families, she decides to keep her baby.
The list goes on… Your financial support gives birth parents a glimpse of Christ’s love. We are answering phone calls, finding ready families, and we appreciate your willingness to give. None of the above would have happened without you. Birth moms, that have chosen abortion, need to feel our compassion and love through the body of Christ. CHASK specifically has a heart for parents that feel burdened by pregnancy beyond just “bad timing” or “life-inconvenience.” The unborn babies and birth moms we search for are facing true tragedy. Please help us make life-choices possible for the birth moms who contact us. Together we can keep CHASK and NATHHAN available for birth parents 24 hours a day, 7 days a week. Our family and staff is dedicated to counseling and assuring birth parents. Help and/or loving, adoptive families are ready right now, no matter what a baby’s special needs may be. We are thrilled that Dana chose to love and help Mandy, showing her Christ’s love and forgiveness. Showing the love of God to a birth mom after she has an abortion is a very effective way to share the good news of forgiveness which is in Christ Jesus. It takes a special CHASK family to look beyond the termination of the baby’s life that they had promised to love, and meet that woman in her sorrow. It can mean even more to a birth mom than a promise to love and raise her baby. Sometimes Jesus allows tragedy in our lives to bring us to a point of decision. Please help us minister to birth parents needing to hear about forgiveness in a desperate way. Sharing the heart of Christ, means sharing forgiveness.
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